The Doctor says goodbye

I just don’t know what to do with myself anymore. I still have that excruciatingly painful headache and I’m bored out of my mind. Let’s talk about what happened Friday.

In no particular order… other than numerical.

1) I’ve been locked out of my voicemail.
2) Watched Crash with Xandi and Annie.
3) Sat in Xandi’s car for awhile and had a headache.
4) Sat in Xandi’s car and sang along with her cd player.
5) Ended up in Richmond.
6) Befriended Ultraman.
7) Watched kid throw up.
8) Heard the projector throughout Crash.
9) Heard the Dancing Pants movie or whatever it was called next door. Though it sounded a bit too ominous.
10) Played football for like 4 hours :(.
11) Did some physics and learned stuff.
12) Saw an old guy on the bus carrying a two by four.

I don’t think I’m going to go see Bruce Campbell this Sunday which upsets me a bit. But hey, Joxer was better anyway.

I don’t know why I’m doing it again as it’s not helping. I still feel a slight loathing towards my general direction and it’s not helping with the studying or the motor skills.

Let’s recap what happened today. Cellphone dead as it has a 10 cent balance. So I go to meet my friend and she’s all antsy and shit. This gets strange now. A few hours later I try and kiss her but I missed her mouth and got her nose. Trying to not look like a fucking idiot I keep going and try again but end up going around her mouth and down her neck. She stops me for a bit and asks what I’m doing. I pause for a moment and ignore her. She says something else and I stopped again and then she asks me why I stopped. I don’t know why really. I got her right on the mark this time though and this went on a while. My head was hurting again so she took me to lay down on the couch. We started talking, well she did at least, about stuff and I kept on wondering what I was doing their. I left. Sometimes I’m a fucking social introvert. I’m not going to talk to her anymore. I’ve done this kind of shit a few times before without any cause or provocation. Just to see what’ll happen. I get away with a lot as some of you may know and I don’t know why. I’d never try this on my friends though, well I don’t think I would.

I just want to feel something different. Something else, not this everyday garbage. I want to leave and go somewhere but I don’t know where yet. I remember I wanted to go to Tibet at one point but not anymore. Maybe somewhere bigger.