Why Combining 2 Last Names After Marriage Is Dumb!

[Muran]

How depressing.

[Bizud]

Nah.

 

5678

[Lauren]

live in the now!

[little miss sunshine]

and if your husband dies, the marriage and your relationship doesn't end. that's what love is.

My friends husband died and she changed her last name back to her maiden name, like the next year. Not quite sure why she thought she had to do that.

[borntohula]

there's not much psychology. when you marry someone you join their family, and taking their last name shows that.

 

and if your husband dies, the marriage and your relationship doesn't end. that's what love is.

 

i really don't see how taking someone's last name when you get married is a rights thing. it's not ownership.

no, but it was about ownership.

 

i think that taking a person's name is an archaic practise and won't have anything to do with it. sure, the lady is joining my family, but aren't i joining hers as well? why change your last name at all? why do people feel the need to express their relationship and love through symbols? the changing of one's last name, the wedding band, the wedding itself are all symbols, and none of which contribute to the meaning of a long-lasting relationship whatsoever.

 

moonlight's logic for starting this topic is fucking painful.

 

also, props to lauren.

 

men aren't raised with the same conventions as women. of course ou don't understand changing your name, you'll never be faced with the option (let alone have it expected of you).

Edited October 11, 2007 by borntohula

[Shiri]

If two people get married and the woman keeps her name, then what last name will their children use? I understand where his logic comes from.

 

I just say we lose all last names and just have a first name and perhaps a middle one.

[Lauren]

i could rock my middle name.

[Azalroth]

But if you had no last name then your Middle name would become your last name....so yea same problem

[Ravenous megin-sane]

in response to everything....

 

of course it used to be a rights thing, and i never stated otherwise. but today in our society it's not and clearly women arn't feeling pressured to take their husband's last name since there's so many females out there who didn't.

 

there's a lot more to it than just tradition. for example, a lot of doctors or laywers that have their own practices won't change their last name 'cause of the trouble they'll have to go through in order to legally change their practice's name and who they're known as by their clients.

 

and bizud, i'm sure if you were in a strong, meaningful relationship with someone and they died unexpectantly you wouldn't just get up and forget them. the feelings would still be there. and i know if my husband died, i wouldn't change my last name.

 

lastly, shiri of course i'll marry you, but i'm not sure taylor is the best last name you could get

[borntohula]

If two people get married and the woman keeps her name, then what last name will their children use? I understand where his logic comes from.

right, but not his fear that eventually last names will be these uncontrollable monstrosities.

 

oh noes! what will we do?!

[Shiri]

But if you had no last name then your Middle name would become your last name....so yea same problem

But we choose our middle names! Well, our parents choose them but still, it can be anything, while our last names don't.

[Ravenous megin-sane]

i love my middle name and would totally go for that

[Shiri]

I don't have a middle name so I'll just make one up!

[Ravenous megin-sane]

you can have mine, if you want

[AnOceanPearl]

I can't even imagine what my job would be like if I couldn't search the 411 database without a last name! *cry*

 

When/if I get married, it doesn't matter much to me if my wife chooses to take my name, keep hers or hyphenate it. The name isn't important.

[Shiri]

What should be my middle name? What sounds good with Shiri?! I need to think about it

[AnOceanPearl]

Shiri Bo-Biri

 

Then you will get that horrendous song stuck in everybody's head.

 

It's brilliant.

[bishopx]

Shiri Mozambique? Just thought I'd throw that one out there.

[Shiri]

Haha guys, keep trying

[bishopx]

How about Shiri L'Vana (I figured I toss a hebrew name out there..the translation is "Moon")

[supercanuk]

no, but it was about ownership.

 

i think that taking a person's name is an archaic practise and won't have anything to do with it. sure, the lady is joining my family, but aren't i joining hers as well? why change your last name at all? why do people feel the need to express their relationship and love through symbols? the changing of one's last name, the wedding band, the wedding itself are all symbols, and none of which contribute to the meaning of a long-lasting relationship whatsoever.

 

moonlight's logic for starting this topic is fucking painful.

 

also, props to lauren.

 

men aren't raised with the same conventions as women. of course ou don't understand changing your name, you'll never be faced with the option (let alone have it expected of you).

Bingo.

 

 

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned this so far but historically speaking, in our Canadian and American tradition a woman took the name of her husband because they become one person, legally, at marriage. In fact it wasn't until i believe the 1800s that a woman could even sue her husband because they were considered to be the same person legally, therefore you could not sue "yourself" legally. That changed, but it most certainly was about ownership back in the day. Now people have changed that into a romantic notion which is a far better way to look at it.

[Shiri]

Charles, only 50 year olds are called Levana. Haha.

[bishopx]

I was going to give that to my daughter as a middle name, if I had one.

 

How about Shiri Miranda?

Edited October 15, 2007 by bishopx

[Shiri]

Nah, I want something special and not ordinary!

[bishopx]

How about Shiri Delainya