This Is Gold.

[WalrusMeat]

I read this and found it absolutely hilarious.

I also decided to return to the bored once again.

So I figured I'd start by posting this.

 

Is Your Child A Computer Hacker?

 

Hope you find it as amusing as I did.

 

Discuss.

[Sparq]

That's pretty good.

[ecnarf]

I'm going to go ahead and ask the obvious:

 

-was that supposed to be satire?

-what the fuck were all those links doing there?

-WHY THE FUCK DID YOU THINK THAT WAS APPROPRIATE CONVERSATIONAL FODDER?

[WalrusMeat]

Adam, did your ego grow even bigger since we last talked?

 

I'm amazed.

[Hyphnip]

did he describe "Comet Cursor", "Bonzi Buddy" and "Flash" as hacker programs? That comfused me a little bit. Also, number 4 "Does your child read hacking manuals?" I think that'd be a pretty good sign that he might be. that'd be like making a website about how to tell if your daughter is having sex and having a point "is she taking a lot of pregnancy tests?"

 

I think this guy sis serious about all of this too. I'm very confused.

[no yu begin wher i end]

Cryptonomicon is a sweet book.

[Azalroth]

First I'd like to say that I can understand the concern with computer hackers and the worry that your own kid could become one...

 

 

1. Has your son asked you to change ISPs?

 

Ok first of wall...alright yea this COULD be a sign of a computer hacker, but it COULD also be a sign of a smart consumer. Second...AOL...come on...adult content blockers...hello proxie sites

 

2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?

 

A couple terms for this guy to look up....

Spyware

Ad-ware

 

3. Has your child asked for new hardware?

 

Ok, upgrading software...not much of a concern here...but attacking AMD? Does this guy work for Intel or something? Bah

 

4. Does your child read hacking manuals?

 

Apparently having an interesting in technology is a bad thing...there is such a thing in careers as a Security Professional

 

5. How much time does your child spend using the computer each day?

 

bahahahahahahahahaha

 

6. Does your son use Quake?

 

WTF? If maybe you haven't raised your child well...then yea...alright sure... ;)

 

7. Is your son becoming argumentative and surly in his social behaviour?

 

Hello awkward teenage years/highschool development of personality...duh

 

8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?

 

Holy motherfucker...wtf. This guy did "research" and still doesn't have the history of *LINUX* right? God damn son...get your info right.

 

Linux, Linux Torvald, Microsoft created telnet.

History of Linux

 

9. Has your son radically changed his appearance?

 

Is he talking about a hippy?

 

10. Is your son struggling academically?

 

Uh yea...school does get harder for some...yeesh cut a kid some slack.

 

"In extreme cases, over-exposure to computer radiation can cause schizophrenia, meningitis and other psychological diseases."

 

Oh damn that's good

 

 

As a final note...why is this guy so sexist about the whole thing...although not as likely as guys, there are female hackers in the world believe it or not.

 

If parents actually follow this, and I'm sure that there will be quiet a large number that will sadly, then they're kids are gonna be seriously screwed.

 

that is all.

[Crusader]

it's an old joke heh. AOL!!

[bishopx]

That's too funny.

[Monochrome Rainbow]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adequacy.org

 

 

Satirical article posted on Adequacy.org many moons ago.

[Guest jsunC]

lol, that last one gave it away