The Rhino Party

[WalrusMeat]

Rhino Party

 

If more people thought like this, I wouldn't be so alone.

 

I would of voted for them.

[static]

I always thought it had been started by Frank magazine.

If i wasn't so concerned with wasting my vote, then i too would vote for them.

[WalrusMeat]

Yeah, what a great party.

[jesuisspatula]

Rhinoceros Party platform

__________________________________________________ _________________________________________

 

Bryan Gold of the Rhinoceros Party described the party platform as two feet high and made of wood. "My platform is the one I'm standing on." A candidate named Ted "not so" Sharp ran in Flora MacDonald's Ontario riding with the campaign slogan "Fauna, not flora", promising to give fauna equal representation. Sharp's platform on the then-controversial abortion issue was clear: "If elected, I promise to never have an abortion." Party Member (and singer) Michel Rivard once went on tv (during free air time given to political party) and stated: "I have but two things to say to you: Celery and Sidewalk. Thank you, good night."

 

 

The Rhinos have also promised to break every promise (a platform plank they claim has been copied and put into execution by the mainstream parties) and have promised, if elected, to immediately demand a recount.

 

 

Other platform promises released by the Rhinoceros Party included:

 

Repealing the law of gravity,

Reducing the speed of light because it's much too fast,

Paving the province of Manitoba to create the world's largest parking lot,

Providing higher education by building taller schools,

Instituting English, French and illiteracy as Canada's three official languages,

Offering to retrain those constituents who want to become illiterate by enrolling them in a state educational institution,

Tearing down the Rocky Mountains so that Albertans could see the Pacific sunset, or moving them one metre west as a make-work project,

Legalising pot. And pans. And spatulas. And other kitchen utensils,

Building sloping roads and bicycle paths across the country so that Canadians could "coast from coast to coast",

Responding to the energy crisis, reducing energy costs for transportation by moving the cities of Montr

[WalrusMeat]

Umm, Christina, you can read all that in the link. There is no need to copy and paste it sweetheart.

[jesuisspatula]

shut up, I'm a n00b.

[WalrusMeat]

.... *points and laughs*

[supercanuk]

Have any of you guys looked at how many parties exist in Canada? Its laughable, forget the three party system try like the 68 party system theres tons of them.

Edited November 14, 2005 by supercanuk

[WalrusMeat]

I know, I plan on having a political party one of these days. It'll be named "WalrusMeat"

And, well.... It will one day take over the world, seeing how I'm Ninja.

[jesuisspatula]

But of course, and I am to be leader of this party as it is and always has been my destiny to become Prime Minister of Canada. VOTE CHRISTINA!

 

and MaryAnn for pope.

[WalrusMeat]

You'd be no where in this world without me.

[no yu begin wher i end]

I can't wait to be the first president of Canada. I'll agitate Quebec into separating and then invade and impose martial law. That'll teach those Bloc bastards.

[WalrusMeat]

I see where you're comming from...

 

I think I may be able to help you. Me and my blue prints of the Parliment Buildings...

[ourmodernred]

In this election they would be the best candidate. We have a bunch of useless candidates we can barely stand, it's like a gun to our head.

[ecnarf]

But of course, and I am to be leader of this party as it is and always has been my destiny to become Prime Minister of Canada. VOTE CHRISTINA!

 

and MaryAnn for pope.

MaryAnn can't be Pope. She's a girl.

 

Vote me for Pope. I'm actually eligible.

[WalrusMeat]

Maryann so can be Pope, I'm going to post some pictures of her, to show you her Pope Potential!

[ecnarf]

I'm so much more Popey than her.

 

For example, I'm Italian. At least, party Italian. I look white, so you wouldn't know by guessing, but it's there.

 

Also, like most of the Renaissance and Middle Ages popes, I'm extremely naughty.

[WalrusMeat]

Reasons to Vote Maryann For Pope!

 

She's

 

 

Talented

 

Snuff Picture

 

Her Wig

 

And her Incredibly Sexy Dance Moves

[no yu begin wher i end]

I wish I was that malleable.

[ecnarf]

That's the best you can do?

[WalrusMeat]

You can beat that?

[ecnarf]

As if my vaugely arrogant rhetorical question wasn't proof enough?

[Ravenous megin-sane]

who's mary ann?

[borntohula]

i ran for pope in my highschool election to point out the folly in the whole election business.

[WalrusMeat]

who's mary ann?

Maryann is one of my good friends, who is running for Pope.

 

As you can see, she would make a wonderful Pope.